Difficult People: 5 Actions

~ What Solomon Knew ~

Solomon was widely known for his wisdom (1 Kings 4:30, 10:24). Today he is considered by many to be among the wisest to ever live. His writings include the book of Proverbs. What does the book of Proverbs say about dealing with difficult people?

Five actions you can and should take. 

1.  Try To Avoid Useless Conflict  ~  “Go from the presence of a foolish man, when you do not perceive in him the lips of knowledge” (Proverbs 14:7). “He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his lips” (20:19).

2.  When Unavoidable Deal With It Quickly  ~  “The beginning of strife is like releasing water; therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts” (Proverbs 17:14). “He who passes by and meddles in a quarrel not his own is like one who takes a dog by the ears” (26:17).  

3.  Don’t You Be Difficult With Them  ~  “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). “The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression” (19:11). “Do not answer a fool according to his folly, lest you also be like him” (26:4).  

4.  Keep Your Cool—Don’t You Lose It  ~  “Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back” (29:11).  

5.  Do Not Seek Retaliation  ~  “Do not say, ‘I will do to him just as he has done to me; I will render to the man according to his work’” (Proverbs 24:29). “If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for so you will heap coals of fire on his head, and the Lord will reward you” (25:21-22). 

If you act according the these five principles you will be exemplifying Christian Character. 

Finally recognize that difficult people are God’s problem and He will deal with them in His way and in His time. Sometimes tough love is required and you must commit the person into God’s hand which may require that they learn the hard way:

Let Them Learn the Hard Way  ~  “A man of great wrath will suffer punishment; for if you rescue him, you will have to do it again” (Proverbs 19:19). 

additional comment:   The book of Proverbs contains 31 relatively short chapters.  Many have found reading a chapter a day (corresponding to the date of the current month) has greatly increased their wisdom. 

~ Robert Lloyd Russell, ABUNDANT LIFE NOW

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Christ in Proverbs

~ Jesus Christ is The Wise Son and Our Source of Wisdom ~

The Bible is about Jesus Christ  ~  “Jesus said to them, ‘How foolish you are, and how slow of heart to believe all that the prophets have spoken!  Did not the Christ have to suffer these things and then enter His glory?’  And beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, He explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning Himself” (Luke 24:25-27).

The Book of Proverbs is all about wisdom—God’s wisdom in particular.  Jesus Christ is our wisdom.  Throughout the book we find a Beloved Son being urged to listen to the teaching and advise of His parents—particularly His Father.  The book presents the choice and differences between a wise walk and foolish behavior.  Both have significant attraction but wisdom is the path to true value and happiness.  If the Son chooses to follow the path of wisdom, His life will be happy and have the Father’s approval.  If, however, the Son chooses the folly of foolish behavior, He will fall into many traps.  The question is which will the Son choose.  That is also the question facing each of us today. 

As a side note, it is interesting to notice that the Scriptures only provide one account about our Lord Jesus Christ in His adolescent years.  This is, of course, a critical time in development when parental wisdom is crucial. 

We read, “His parents went to Jerusalem every year at the Feast of the Passover.  And when He was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem according to the custom of the feast.  When they had finished the days, as they returned, the Boy Jesus lingered behind in Jerusalem.  And Joseph and His mother did not know it; but supposing Him to have been in the company, they went a day's journey, and sought Him among their relatives and acquaintances.  So when they did not find Him, they returned to Jerusalem, seeking Him.  Now so it was that after three days they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both listening to them and asking them questions.  And all who heard Him were astonished at His understanding and answers.  So when they saw Him, they were amazed; and His mother said to Him, ‘Son, why have You done this to us? Look, Your father and I have sought You anxiously.’  And He said to them, ‘Why did you seek Me?  Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s business?’ But they did not understand the statement which He spoke to them.  Then He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was subject to them, but His mother kept all these things in her heart”(Luke 2:41-51). 

At the age of twelve Jesus was in the temple listening to wise teachers and interacting with them.  He was obedient to His parents and went home with them as asked.  But don’t miss the conclusion of this insightful passage,  “And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men” (Luke 2:52). 

Summary  ~  Jesus Christ, the Messiah, modeled the role of the wise Son. 

Comment  ~  We have only touched the surface of Christ in Proverbs.  Much more could be said about each of the previous examples.

~~~ EXPLANATORY “JESUS CHRIST IN EVERY BOOK OF THE BIBLE” SERIES ~~~   

(1)  Approximately once a month ALN posts an overview of how Jesus Christ is seen in a specific book of the Bible.

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~ Robert Lloyd Russell, ABUNDANT LIFE NOW

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If you would prefer to copy this post, please credit ALN as the source by prominently displaying the following statement:  Reprinted from “Abundant Life Now,” a free blog which offers inspiring moments, thought-provoking comments, and solid Biblical insight (http://RobertLloydRussell.blogspot.com/).